Have you ever referred to yourself as “just a stay at home mom”? I’m sure at one time in your life you stayed at home and raised your children, or maybe you are right now.
I never really thought much about this statement until one day someone I love said it. It must have been how she said it that awoke a little crazy in me. She is not “just” anything; she is so much to so many.
As women, we often find ourselves at home with our kids for a period of time, some longer than others. Being a stay at home mom, or family CEO as some like to say, isn’t for everyone and I totally get that. But whether it is a choice to stay home with kids or not, I believe you should be proud of what you do and who you are, and not to limit yourself by your language.
What made me so upset about what my friend said, was the “just”. I feel like by saying “just” we take away the amazing skills, effort and investment that goes into being a mom. Raising your kids is no “just”. I think we may be using the word without even recognizing what it is actually saying.
I know in our culture what we do for a living holds a lot of value. It’s a typical first question when you meet someone. Also, many of us put a lot of time, energy and money into developing our career. I used to be a Social Worker, and getting there took a great deal of investment. When I had my first baby, it was the first time since I was 15 years old that I wasn’t either working the conventional 9-5 or in full time school. It was different and an adjustment. The transition from your career to staying home is huge (at least it was for me), but that doesn’t change your value. Whether you are a lawyer or a mom you have so much more to you. You have so many more layers as a woman and human that make you, you!
Personally, being a mom is my all time favourite thing to do. For those of you who know my infertility story (Infertility :: It Happened to Me), I also put a lot of investment into becoming a mother. The fact is, I changed my whole lifestyle so that I was able to be at home full time, as a mom and a business woman. But that doesn’t mean that staying home with my kids limits me to who I am.
So my fellow woman, I dare you to take the “just” out of your language. Arguably you are doing one of the most challenging and important tasks of your life. From my heart to yours, being a mom is one (very large and amazing) but one, part of all the many things that make up who you are. Maybe you will choose to take the “just” out of your language, or maybe you’ll see yourself as the family CEO, which I also think is pretty great!